وکیل جرایم سایبری
آموزش زبان انگلیسی
آموزش زبان انگلیسی ,آموزش گرامر انگلیسی , مکالمه انگلیسی, اصطلاح , لغت , تست , سرگرمی , ضرب المثل, شعر , داستان , نکته ها ی مهم , و اخبار جالب..

"آموزش رایگان حق شما است"

موضوع بندی
سه‌شنبه 19 تیر‌ماه سال 1386

Subject: Letter of an NIOC employee in English !!!!

When an iranian writes in english
     This letter was written by an employee of the NIOC National, about
fifty years ago.  Someone pulled it out of the archive for laughs.  But the
name of the person who wrote this letter has been erased for secrecy.  
Dear Mr. Hamilton,
Hello sir, "I am your servent, very very much".  
I am writing to you because "all the way to the handle of the knife has
reached my bone.  "My hands grab your skirt", Mr. Hamilton, "Please reach my
scream", Mr. Hamiton, "from the hands of this man, Ahmady" .  I don't know
"what a wet wood I have sold him" that from the very first day he has been
"pulling the belt to my lift" With all kinds of "cat dancing" he has tried
to become the "eye and the light" of Mr.Wilson.
He made so much "mouse running" that finally Mr.Wilson "became donkey" , and
appointed Mr.Ahmadi as his right hand man, and told me to work "under his
Mr.Wilson promised me that next year he would make me his right hand man,
but "my eye didn't not drink water", and I knew that all these were "hat
play", and he was trying to put a "hat on my head" I "put the seal of
silence to my lips" and did not say anything. Since that he was just
"putting watermelon under my arms" Knowing that this transfer was only "good
for his aunt" , I started begging him to forget that I ever came to see him
and forget my visit altogether. I said "you saw camel, you did not see
camel" ... .but he was not "getting of the devils donkey".. ."what headache
shall I give you" I am now forced to work in the mail house with bunch of
"blind, bald, height and half height" people. "Imagine how much my ass
Now Mr.Hamilton, "I turn around your head" you are my only hope and my "back
and shelter"... ."I swear you to the 14 innocents" please "do some work for
me"...."in the resurrection day l'll grasp your skirt"... "I have six head
bread eaters" I kiss your hand and
Leg "
Your servant

سه‌شنبه 19 تیر‌ماه سال 1386

A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy cold winter. They both had jobs, and had difficulty coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the husband checked into the hotel. There he decided to open his laptop and send his wife an e-mail back in Minneapolis. However, he accidentally left off one letter in her address and sent the e-mail without noticing his error.

In the mean time:
In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who had been "called home to glory" following a heart attack (died and gone to report in heaven). The widow checked her e-mail, expecting messages from family and friends. Upon reading the first message, she fainted and fell to the floor. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My loving Wife
From: Your Departed Husband
Subject: I've arrived!

I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then. Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

برای عضویت در خبرنامه این وبلاگ نام کاربری خود در سیستم بلاگ اسکای را وارد کنید
نام کاربری
تعداد بازدیدکنندگان : 2092164

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