A funny story

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A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy cold winter. They both had jobs, and had difficulty coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the husband checked into the hotel. There he decided to open his laptop and send his wife an e-mail back in Minneapolis. However, he accidentally left off one letter in her address and sent the e-mail without noticing his error.

In the mean time:
In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who had been "called home to glory" following a heart attack (died and gone to report in heaven). The widow checked her e-mail, expecting messages from family and friends. Upon reading the first message, she fainted and fell to the floor. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My loving Wife
From: Your Departed Husband
Subject: I've arrived!

I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then. Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

slang

Learn Some New Slang

Apple of her/his eye

MEANING: someone or something that one likes a lot

EXAMPLE:

the little girl is the apple of her grandfather’s eye.

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Bark up the wrong tree

MEANING: choose the wrong course of action

EXAMPLE:

He is barking up the wrong tree. He accuses me of causing the computer
problem but I was away at the time.

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Wolf in sheep’s clothing

MEANING: a person who pretends to be good but really is bad

EXAMPLE:

Be careful of that man. He is a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

ُToefl tests answers‎

1- C) to depict

2-b) could not have been conducting

3-A) in that

4- B) an advocate for children’s rights

5-D) by the teacher

6-A) neither

7-D) that beauty cannot be defined

8-A) does a( it should be: a)

9-B) cause (it should be caused)

10) To avoid (it should be: avoid)

11-B) has (it should be: it has)

12-b) as well the (it should be as well as the)

13-c) either (it should be both)

14-b) puzzling (it should be: puzzle)

اطلاعیه

دوستان عزیزی که به من ایمیل فرستاده اید ( از وبلاگ)  تمام آنها به این باکس ایمیل من نمیروند همه آن ایمیل ها به فولدر بالک میروند. من به تمامی آنها جواب میدهم. نمیدانم آیا به فولدر بالک آنها میرود یا نه؟؟؟ فولدر بالک خودتان را چک کنید. شاید با آنجا برود و شما نبینید. در ضمن اگر کسی با من ایمیل فرستاده و من جواب نداده ام احتملا اشتباهی آن را دیلت کردم ببخشید!

تست تافل

سلام.این هم چند تا تست تافل.برای تستهایی که زیر انها خط کشیده شده
گزینه ای را که نادرست است را انتخاب کنید.جوابهای خودتون رو نگه دارین تا من دفعه بعد
که پاسخ ها را خواهم گذاشت شما با جوابهای خودتان مقایسه کنید.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Toefl (Test of English as a Foreign Language)

1)     The Impressionists were interested in how… a given subject through the feelings of the artist.

(A)   depicted

(B)    could they depict

(C)   to depict

(D)   depicting

2)     Experiments verifying aspects of the theory of special relatively ... until the advent of space travel.

(A)   have been conducting

(B)    could not have been conducting

(C)   had conducted

(D)   being conducted

3)     Lotteries are games of chance … a player’s chance of winning, is governed by nothing more than random luck.

(A)   in that

(B)    that in

(C)    that

(D)   in

4)     Hillary Clinton... has been a leading attorney for the past twenty years.

(A)   is the advocate for children’s rights

(B)    an advocate for children’s rights

(C)   that an advocate for children’s right

(D)   the advocate for children’s right

5)     The seating of students in a classroom is designed ... to minimize personality conflicts and to maximize student performance.

(A)   the teacher of

(B)    from the teacher

(C)   the teacher and

(D)   bye the teacher

6)     Thanks to the use of saline water sources, desert areas can now be termed arable where once.... crops nor animals could survive.

(A)   neither

(B)    nor

(C)   nothing but

(D)   none other

7)     Virtually all philosophers agree...in an objective way.

(A)   beauty that are defined

(B)    beauty they define

(C)   defining beauty

(D)   that beauty cannot be defined

8)     Where does a  river intersects another river, a city usually is formed.

9)     How many dinosaurs initially survived the asteroid impact with the Earth, which ultimately cause the extinction of the species, is open to question.

10)Reptiles must always to avoid extremes of temperature if they are to maintain appropriate body heat.

11)An orangutan is similar to a human because has a nearly identical DNA pattern.

12)Atlanta, Georgia, is a hub of air and train transport, as well the leading symbol of the new South.

13)It has often been observed that love songs are a curious mixture of   either the bitter and the sweet.

14) The way in which Ice Ages occur remains a puzzling, for recent meteorological records can tell us little about the process.

Phrase Thesaurus

Phrase Thesaurus (money)	Meanings
Money makes the world go round	money is the most important thing in life, money solves every problem
Money doesn't grow on trees	to earn money you have to work hard, you can not get free money
Monkey business	dubious activities, illegal business, fooling round, silly game
Coin of the realm	type of currency used by a particular country
Blood money	compensation paid by an offender( usually a murderer) or his kin group to the kin group of the victim. In many societies Blood money functions to prevent the continuation of hostilities in the form of a feud. some customs allow the injured party the choice of punishing the murder by blood vengeance or Blood money.
A penny for your thoughts	what are you thinking about
Time is money	time is worth money, time wasted is like wasting money
The public purse	public funds, national treasury
The penny drops	understand slowly, only comprehended after a period of time
Cost an arm and a leg	cost dearly, be very expensive
As safe as the Bank of England	safe and secure, well protected
Born with a silver spoon in his mouth	a person who will not have to try very hard in order to acquire material wealth
Dead presidents	presidents who are now deceased, paper money, cash in the form of bank notes (slang)
A sugar daddy	rich and older man who gives gifts and money to the younger woman he is wooing (informal)
A pretty penny	considerable amount of money, rather large amount of money
Money talks	money gets people's attention, money can be used to influence people
In for a penny in for a pound	there is nothing to loose, do not start something that you can't finish
Penny wise, pound foolish	capable of dealing with small things but unable to mange the large issues
Quid pro quo	one thing in exchange for another, something in return for something else
Spend money like water	waste money, squander money
Pound of flesh	A justified but disabling request
Pin money	small expenses, pocket money
Money to burn	extra money, surplus cash
Hand to mouth	having nothing to spare, precarious
Dirt cheap	extremely Inexpensive
Filthy rich	obscenely rich, so wealthy that one doesn't know what to do with the money
In the money	rich, successful, wealthy,
Hard up	poor, lacking money, under pressure, troubled
A small fortune	considerable sum of money, a lot of money
Break the bank	win everything in the fund (Roulette)
A bad penny	worthless coin

Idioms and Expressions

Put a cork in it

Definition: Be quiet

Could you please put a cork in it?!
Tom, put a cork in it! I can't hear what Mary is saying

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Put down

Definition: criticize someone

Jack put him down and he hasn't been the same since.
Don't put me down
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Put someone away

Definition: put in prison

They put him away for twenty years.
Jason was put away for life in prison

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Put the finger on someone

Definition: identify someone

The victim put the finger on the criminal.
She put the finger on her boss for the crime
-------.

Put the heat / screws on someone

Definition: pressure someone to do something

He's putting the heat on me to finish the report.
Janet's really putting the screws on her husband to get a new car.

Common Errors in English

Differences Between American and British English

دیروز دوست عزیزی تفاوت بین دو لهجه بریتیش و امریکن را پرسیده است. فکر میکنم این سوال برای خیلی پیش بیاید برای همین جوابش رو اینجا گذاشتم.این هم جواب سوال شما آقا محسن.
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پروین چهارشنبه 8 تیر‌ماه سال 1384 ساعت 12:52 ب.ظ

Differences Between American and British English

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از کیسه خلیفه بخشیدن	Make free/ bold with sth
Example: Your friends at the party who made so free with the drinks were not invited.